I FORGOT ABOUT THIS THING


maybe i should use it again.

Concious Denial.

IM READY LOLZ

LYK, HEY WORLD. LETS ALL BE REALLL MATURE HERE AND TAKE EACH OTHER OFF FRIENDS LISTS ON A WEBSITE BECAUSE WE ARE IN A FIGHT.

And this is from the girl PREACHING FORGIVENESS. The very same girl who ADMITS she has trouble admitting she did something wrong, and thus, has trouble saying sorry. Remember all that babe? Don't preach forgiveness if you can't say your sorry. and don't use examples like that that make you seem all high and mighty. YOU DIDNT FORGIVE HER BECAUSE YOU WANTED TO. YOU FORGAVE HER BECAUSE SHE IS "IN ALL YOUR CLASSES" AND YOU DIDNT WANT TOO MUCH DRAMA. 

Wow. just wow lmao. 

Unlike you, I'm not gonna hide it from you. its about you, its your business babe.

 
PS- I know you are going through alot of shit. And you dont want any more. WELL THEN QUIT CAUSING IT. You started insulting me on shit you know i really cared about because its a sensitive topic for you. Thats wrong babe. Thats what got me pissed. I avoid speaking my mind about shit when I know it'll REALLY insult you. And now this really mature move to take someone off your friends list? YEAH BABE. TRY FOLLOWING YOUR OWN ADVICE. TRY FORGIVING. QUIT CAUSING MORE PROBLEMS SO YOU CAN BE MORE DEPRESSED. and if you want to be more depressed for whatever reason (I can think of one), QUIT COMPLAINING ABOUT IT. ITS WHAT YOU WANT. Thast the one thing I learned this summer. And oh gee, I figured it out high too. WHO EVER SAID YOU DONT ACCOMPLISH ANYTHING HIGH.

Ouch.

Uh, okay? 


Today was boring as hell.  AS HELL. My day was the same pattern i followed everyday.

Woke up
showered
Went to work
came home
went into my room
put away todays shit from work
watch tv/ play video games
eat dinner
watch tv/ play video games
smoke
take a shower
do something high
sleep

Its stupid and boring. Especialyl the work part. Here was my day:
Get in, put like sixty something sax reeds in sixty something sax mouth pieces. Then I put on sixty something sax caps and bagged each one of them into sixty something bags. One at a time. more mundane than a great DANE on MUNdays. Then I had to clean a bari sax. Now, those things are half the size of me and get quite dirty, that took like an hour. then it was sax, sax, sax, sax, sax, sex (heh i had to), sax sax again and again until near the end of the day when i did a hundred something trumpet mouthpieces. That was even worse.

Then I met that steve kid at the creek when I got home to give him a slide, then went back to my hosue and started thinking some terrible shit, so i sorta just layed there. and did nothing. then got high. and life was good again =)

So I was thinking, My paernts give me twenty bucks allowance a month. Twenty bucks. What exactly does that allow me to do? Eat out once? buy a twenty bag? I demand some changes in these affairs =P

I'm gonna start doing public and private entries. Cause well, no point in friends only seeing as i really have no friends who are gonna read it now (yay for emo thoughts and a livejournal that constantly reminds me that I only have one friend =P)  And I can be open with my private entries cause I highly doubt anyone has my password. Does someone? hmm....

Is it worth it can you even hear me
Standing with your spotlight on me
Not enough to feed the hungry
I'm tired and I felt it for awhile now
In this sea of lonely
The taste of ink is getting old
It's four o' clock in the fucking morning
Each day gets more and more like the last day
Still I can see it coming
While I'm standing in the river drowning
This could be my chance to break out
This could be my chance to say goodbye
At last it's finally over
Couldn't take this town much longer
Being half dead wasn't what I planned to be
Now I'm ready to be free

So here I am it's in my hands
And I'll savor every moment of this
So here I am alive at last
And I'll savor every moment of this

And won't you think I'm pretty
When I'm standing top the bright lit city
And I'll take your hand and pick you up
And keep you there so you can see
As long as you're alive and care
I promise I will take you there
We'll drink and dance the night away
We'll drink and dance the night away

Uh, excuse me world. This is friend's only.

But I'll add you if like, you reallyyyyyyy want me to.

or if you can tell me why my computer just rang like a phone and why i had to turn off the speakers cause it was scary.

but only if i know you.